Today is my 7th anniversary. Yesterday we (Roger and I) celebrated his birthday. Yes, we are both Scorpios. As a matter of fact a lot of my friends are Scorpios. We seem to gather in some secret enclave.
Yesterday I played happy birthday (its one of my ring tones) by the Beatles and danced for Rog. He was so impressed – I could tell!
Today he got the raw version of Happy Anniversary Baby got you on my mind! What an exciting day to such an auspicious occasion – don’t you think?
It’s been a totally awesome 9 years with this man. He loves me unconditionally and patiently navigates my moods and supports my creativity and life path with absolute devotion.
So what do I do for him? Well, I mirror those strands of the relationship back. I’ve supported him when he was weary and was patient and kind when he needed time out and I’ve made him laugh – what’s more! Does it getter than that? Well, yes, that is the plan!
Yesterday we walked the bush trail for our afternoon stroll. As we walked we made plans for our future. We put them into three main categories: personal – relationship and career. After Roger shared his personal goals I committed mine to the moment. I then suggested another sub category of – family – children and grandchildren. We made plans and agreed on the thoughts, words and ideas. On Tuesday morning when the New Moon is in Scorpio we will commit them to the universe.
It’s a 10/1 day and I want to end the less than positive movie reel that is going on in my head.
I picked up a book yesterday from the bookcase in our tiny retreat. It is a book I read last year and I gravitated back to it again. The title is: Love and Letting go of Fear. I want to buy my own copy when I return home. The book was written by a psychiatrist – Gerald G Jampolsky. In his authors note he writes: “We teach what we want to learn, and I want to learn to experience inner peace.” So be it!
Some of the Principles in the book are pretty clear cut – release the past; words to eliminate from our vocabulary; forgiveness is the key to happiness etc. And one other which is relevant for me today, “the past is over and it cannot touch me.” I like this statement and especially the concept of putting all of my painful, guilty, fearful thoughts into a helium balloon and printing, “I forgive my misperceptions” on to the balloon and releasing it into the sky.
In honour of this 10/1 day I would like to do that now!
The Sun trines Uranus today and the cosmos are electrified by these two planets. The flow of inventiveness – new concepts are generated and supported with this alignment.
I’m not saying that, letting go of fear is a new concept – as a matter of fact I think that it is played over in many forms over the millennia. And it’s certainly not a new concept for me either – I’ve worked don this many times in my lifetime. What I am saying is that this is the concept for me today. Take stock of the past – give thanks for the lessons and release the toxic reminders into the balloon. It’s not just the thoughts, words and beliefs it is the actions – reactions that must drift off into the balloon.
For example, how do we react when someone hurts us? Well my first reaction is to retreat. Then I skilfully build a wall around myself. During the construction of this wall I put in lots of putty (sugar and carbohydrates) and then brick by brick I deliberately block out my aggressor. I may wear the mask of a happy person but the tempest dwells and the storm is brewing. After a while I either shrug it off as insignificant or I move on or sometimes offer my scorpion stinger and deliver a hit.
We all have our own defence mechanisms and mine vary from person to person or situation to situation. I am an emotional woman. I have feelings, sensitivities and I hurt. What I do with that hurt entwines with my DNA. There are many forms of bullying, hiding or storying that hurt and they are as unique as you are.
Some people have a scrapbook or blog and bleed in public life and others go into hiding. Whatever has hurt you in the past cannot hurt you today – only if you allow it to – that person doesn’t even think about you – they’ve moved on and taken their toxic arrows with them. The only person who is still hurting is you – break the cycle and love yourself enough to heal the wounds of the past – let it be!
I work consistently toward my goals of releasing the past. I take advantage of every opportunity and maximise the number of ways an event can take place, I increase the probability that all good and wonderful things will happen.
Peace and Love,
Julia Ashton-Sayers
No comments:
Post a Comment